I studied astrology some years ago and it helped me formulate four ways of operating in the world that I like to call, “modes of being”. Here they are: thinking, feeling, doing, and accepting. Each mode has an advantage and a disadvantage, and no one mode is any better than any other. The key for these modes is to keep a comfortable balance and not operate in any one mode excessively.
We all recognize our rational ability. For most of Western society, being reasonable and logical predominates. It is very valuable for passing exams in school and for making calculated decisions. Sometimes, however, we think too much. We want to know the reasons for something when there is no reason easily forthcoming. For example, if someone hates you, you wonder why and forget that emotion is not reasonable. Too much thinking can also become procrastination when we keep planning a vacation without any follow through. To get out of thinking too much, jump into expressing your emotional feelings, do something physical, or learn meditation.
As for the feeling mode, we all have emotions. Some of us are more sensitive than others and usually have had a greater share of upset in their past. Unfortunately they have not successfully dealt with their past trauma; it still lingers on and erupts periodically when current trauma, however slight, stirs it up.
Maintaining emotional health means expressing and releasing feelings readily in order that we can move on to other experiences. When we let go of our emotions, we avoid carrying them around and avoid all their untoward effects on emotional and physical imbalance. Despite the benefit of emotional expression, excessive emotion should be released in a comfortable, balanced, and consistent manner. Thinking can help us through our emotions by providing a rational view to support us, “things will get better after this crisis because we’ve seen it happen every time in the past.”
Doing is a rather straightforward procedure. You just do it. You are not concerned about thinking and you don’t let your feelings get in the way. You can get a lot accomplished. On the other hand, the leap-before-you-think syndrome makes for impulsive, hasty decisions. Also sometimes people use their “doing” to keep their minds off their worries; this can be addictive and unhealthy because you avoid dealing with an emotion or issue that needs to be confronted. A simple remedy for excessive doing is to relax in whatever way that works for you.
Accepting things is simple, but it is not necessarily easy. Taking things the way they are is simple because you have no choice really — that is, no choice in the moment. For the moment, things are the way they are and that is what is so. What is dangerous is for you to accept things too readily because you just want peace. The end result of this is that you gloss over a problem that silently grows until you have no choice but to be forced act on it. Sometimes that is too late. To counter excessive acceptance, look at your feelings about a situation, think about a strategy to change it, and carry out your plan.
Please consider these modes of being and play with them to find the balance that works best for your life. Learn to use them effectively and you’ll achieve greater success naturally!